The Work Situation. All of my cover letters manage to sound both obsequious and blase’ at the same time. No one is ever going to hire me.
The Vanity Situation. There is now a certifiable bald spot at the top of my head. My dad didn’t start losing his hair until his mid-thirties. I am 22. I am going to look like James Taylor by the time I’m 25. Total strangers are going to expect me to play banal, self-conciously fauxlksy tunes on an acoustic guitar. This is not fair.
Don’t Let Me Be Mistaken for This Clown Tonight.
The I Should NOT Have to Endure Seasonal Affective Disorder for Eight Months Out of the Goddamn Year, Only to Be Slapped in the Face with an Unseasonably Hot Summer, Pacific Maritime Climate Zone Situation. As of 13:10 PST, it is officially five degrees warmer here than in Los Angeles. Unacceptable.
The Browsing Census Bureau Data Instead of Trying to Make My Cover Letters Less Appalling Situation. Portland doesn’t get to form the Combined Statistical Area with Salem to which it is clearly entitled, but Atlanta is allowed to include La Grange in its CSA. “The La Grange that might as well be a suburb of Columbus, you mean?” That would be the one, yes. UNACCEPTABLE.
The Are We Honestly Still Talking About This? Situation I just stood my dentist up for the 9th or so time this year. I am not going to be able to show my face in that office ever again. My teeth, meanwhile, continue their steady evolution into mush.
Stay Informed; Stay Indifferent: LazyFair Status Updates.