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The Really Cool Thing About a CameraPigeon (Besides the Obvious, I Mean), Would be the Incredible Blackmail Potential. Think About It. Nobody Ever Notices a Pigeon Following Them.

Earthquake!  This morning.  Oh, yeah.

It’s not the first one to happen since I came out here, but it’s the first one I’ve actually felt.  (The other ones have all occurred in the wee hours, and I’m a heavy sleeper unless I have to piss.) 

Almost everybody I’ve ever talked to out here says that at first, they always mistake an earthquake for a train going by.  And sure enough, my first thought when I began to feel the room rumble was: “Hmm. Train.”  Except that then I remembered that my store isn’t located next to the railroad, at which point I burst out of the cash office and began excitedly asking people if they felt anything. 

Tiny earthquakes are pretty cool.  You hear the distant thundering, but you don’t see anything shaking (which I imagine would add a lot of anxiety to the experience).  You can feel the plates grinding under you, but only if you’re paying attention.  It’s all over in less than 5 minutes, and nothing gets damaged.  So you get all of the natural disaster cred without having to undergo any of the requisite trauma. 

Interestingly, that’s kind of how I feel about Portland as a city: you get all of the respect bestowed upon people who “brave” urban environments, without ever being in any real danger of anything beyond half-heartedly aggressive pan-handling. 

I’ll be bitching some more about school next time.  Don’t sigh like that.  It’ll be funny this time, I swear.

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3 responses »

  1. Dude! Cool! The only earthquakes we had in Japan were really small (at least, the only ones that happened where I was–there was that huge one while we were there but we weren’t anywhere close). Just vague notions of earthquakes to the point that I wasn’t sure if it was just that I was a little dizzy or something. I didn’t even know the first one was an earthquake until Masa mentioned it. And then it was like…oh! So that’s why the ground was shaking.

    Did I tell you we decided the worst place to be in an earthquake is on the monorail at the zoo. Cause even if you don’t crash to the ground you still have to worry about getting out. And even if you get out you still have to worry about a lion eating you.

    Reply
  2. I can’t believe I missed the goddamn earthquake!

    And the thing about escaping from the monorail into the zoo is that the lions will probably be disoriented for a while, giving you time to acquire weapons, and also I bet that flamingos are pretty easy to catch. And with those legs, they’re practically already on spits.

    Sorry Andrew. That was gruesome.

    CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR EXAM! You kicked ass. Someday the fools shall call you “sir.” Which will almost certainly be more fun than it sounds.

    Reply
  3. I’m going to Cozumel on the cruise, I think. It might be a little lame, but at least it’s Mexico. I’ve always wanted to go.

    And I just wish I’d learned more in school–it doesn’t have anything to do with the job searching. I’m a really good test taker and I had a tendency to rely on that over actual knowledge when I had better things to do than the reading. Now that the grades don’t count for shit I wish I’d picked up more.

    And I just can’t stand the sound of his voice. I don’t know how anyone can stand it. He’s like Madonna–I really don’t know why she’s so popular; she can’t sing very well at all.

    Also, the book is The Graveyard Book. I got into Neil Gaiman when I was working at the herbarium because his audio books are usually read by him, and audio books are nice when you’re doing something that doesn’t require a lot of thought. He’s a very good writer if you’re willing to let realism go.

    Reply

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